How can I lower my maintenance payments?

For 17 months I have been the primary care taker of our two kids and I have physical custody and 50-50 legal for the last 3 months. She had disappeared for over 120 days during the 17 months spending time with at least two different beaus. I had to support her while she was in the house, gave her $10K to move out and $450 a month for maintenance. She was also receiving monies from the various boyfriends and traveled to Europe at least 4-5 times. Three weeks ago the judge raised her maintenance from $450 to $1400 a month because she said that she spent most of the $10K that I gave her to leave. I have to pay for two households, I have spent $60K for the litigation,and she doesn't want to work as far as I know. The judge told her to find a job even at McDonald's, which I doubt, and start paying child support. I'm very frustrated with the system because I followed the rules and I'm getting penalized for it. I was faithful during the entire marriage, provided everything for the family, took exclusive care of the kids for the last 20 months (she went on vacation for 23 days while our son was receiving chemotherapy), and now I have to keep on supporting her even though she lives with her boyfriend. What are some things that I can do to lower the maintenance payments? Money that actually should go to the kids, but she wants everything that she can get!! Thanks!